How often were we told as children to 'mind our language,' yet were also told: 'sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me?' It seemed such a contradiction. So do words hold power and does our language matter?
The reality is, words do matter. Both the ones spoken to us and the ones we say to ourselves. Yet when do we decide what to take in and what to let go of? Often, amongst plenty of positivity, one negative comment stands out, capturing our attention and overshadowing everything else. Why do we let this happen? It’s a destructive cycle - one that’s tricky to break.
It’s not just about what others say to us (whether to our faces or behind our backs) It’s also about our self-talk. How often do we listen to the positive internal dialogue compared to the negative? For many people the critical inner voice can dominate their thinking.
This internal dialogue often spills into our conversations. We may disguise it as humour, self-deprecation, or low self-esteem - especially in British culture. Do we actually believe what we’re saying? Sadly often, the answer is yes. These thoughts can then create limiting beliefs: I can’t do that. I’m not good enough. That’s for someone else, not people like me.
What we think about ourselves shapes the language we use, which in turn reinforces our beliefs and behaviours. It is like a self-fulfilling prophecy or in today's terminology 'manifesting.' If this is the case, surely we would want to use positive language to break free our limiting beliefs?
So what if we changed the way we spoke to and about ourselves? Could it lead to a better life? Could shifting our language create positive changes in how we see ourselves and the world around us? Could it help us step into the person we truly want to be, using our skills and resources to their fullest potential?
Leslie Cameron-Bandler and Rodger Bailey, pioneers of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), once said, 'People who use the same language patterns in their speech have the same behaviours.' If that is true, changing our words could be the first step toward changing our behaviours and, ultimately, our lives.
It can start with small steps. As we notice unhelpful words or phrases, we can intentionally replace them with positive ones. Over time, this process can transform both our internal and external dialogue, leading to meaningful change. These small things can have a big impact.
Personally, I’ve become much more conscious of the language I use about myself. This awareness has shifted how I see myself and the opportunities that are now available to me.
I would challenge those of you that have taken the time to read this, to consider what language you are using now, that isn't helpful and you want to start replacing? Give yourself the time and kindness you need to make those subtle changes and see what differences they make.
Mind your language!
Thanks as always for reading
JennyB
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